DOMINANCE
The power to determine right and wrong
and to enforce it with the threat of humiliation.
(The power to avoid humiliation for myself).
PLEASE (submit to what's right for you)
- How do I make sure others get their way?
- What do I always - or never - do to avoid criticism?
- How does doing what others want keep me from getting or doing what I want?
- In what ways do I do as I'm told, or as I think others expect?
- What am I afraid might happen if I displease you?
PROVE (make it obvious how right I am)
- How do I try to prove that I'm right even if just to myself?
- How do I impose my way/choice and disregard yours?
- How do I drive myself to win, to be better than others?
- How do I make sure I'm the one who sets the rules?
- Who do I try to impress? How?
- What am I afraid might happen if I'm not right, not the best?
FAIL (hide what is wrong with me)
- How does self-doubt limit my options?
- How do I prematurely give up on myself ("I ca-a-an't")?
- What have I wanted to do, or get, and never tried?
- How do I stay overwhelmed, with too much (or too little) to do?
- How have I been ridiculed for failures in the past?
- How/when do I judge myself to be stupid or inadequate?
- What am I afraid might happen if I accepted my limits?
INSULT (expose what's wrong with you)
- How do I show others how wrong they are?
- How do I find fault with others and let them know about it?
- When do I put down someone in front of others?
- What behaviors do I consider to be deserving of ridicule?
- How am I sarcastic without concern for others' feelings?
- In what ways am I unreasonably critical of myself?
- What am I afraid might happen if I stopped being so harsh?
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